Beware of the rant!
If you recall, I got into a bit of a fender bender in Ireland, and because I DIDN’T put the car on my credit card, and DIDN’T waive the absurd rental car insurance, and because I HAPPENED to be driving into an UNMARKED intersection in the middle of NOWHERE when a car came out from behind a BUILDING causing me to hit it:
I am responsible for paying the ENTIRE deductible amount of $2,317 USD.
Nevermind fairness.
Nevermind following through with the accidental report to see how much the damages actually cost.
Nevermind ANYTHING that would help me out in any way.
It is I, who has part-time employment, barely any benefits, and dreams to launch a creative career that garners $0 net income, who will be $2,317 in the hole this month.
So forgive me for feeling a little rant-y.
It’s a lot of money that I could better spend on other things, namely my planned escape to Europe this summer (where I will NOT be renting a car), where I’d ideally like to change my identity and become the next J.K. Rowling.*
*because she was living in Scotland when she wrote Harry Potter.
(Within the scope of this blog, I’ve aspired to be Liz Gilbert, David Sedaris, A.J. Jacobs, and J.K. Rowling. At least I keep the bar set at a realistic level.)
This got me to thinking of other, better ways I could spend money than on a cause I don’t believe in, and that led me to create the following list. I could be the next great humanitarian and/or very selfish and fat.
Behold the ways in which this money could otherwise be spent.
23 Ways To Spend $2,317 Other Than Paying Off Damages To A Rental Car That Was Not Entirely My Fault And Could Have Been Avoided Altogether
I could have:
1. Sponsored my World Vision child for five and a half years.
2. Filled up my gas tank 77 times, thus allowing me to drive from New England to New Mexico thirteen times.
3. Bought two round trip tickets to Europe.
4. Drank 662 cartons of Over the Moon Chocolate Milk
5. Seen 205 movies in theatre.
6. (and watched a RedBox movie every night for the next 6 years)
7. Eaten P.F. Chang’s Prix-fixe for Two (a three-course meal for two people) 58 times.
8. Purchased enough anti-malaria pills to save 579 people.
(a video that describes the cause)
9. Given myself a new pair of running shoes every four months (as is recommended) for the next seven years.
10. Bought a half-gallon of Hood’s Fudge Brownie Low-Fat Frozen Yogurt every week for nearly nine years (and been very healthy)
11. Given 1,000 people access to clean water in Africa
12. Had the next three months’ rent paid for.
13. Tithed a full 10% for a year and a half.
14. Supported KLove radio station for 4.5 years.
15. I could have bought 650 pounds of blueberries (since I eat them every morning), which is equivalent to the weight of three baby elephants.
16. I could have given out 1,800 Gideon New Testament Bibles. (Think of all the hotels!)
17. I could have made an $11.80 contribution to every country in the world.
18. Bought a 7-night all-inclusive stay at a Jamaica’s Sandals resort for myself and one other lucky person.**
19. Fully funded (X 100) my goal for the Walk for Hunger team I joined.
20. Become a “Humane Leader” of the Humane Society for two years, preventing cruelty and bringing about transformational change for animals.
21. Bungy jumped off the Nevis (the highest jump in Australasia, located in New Zealand) 9 times.***
But it IS the first commercial bungy jump in the world (the Kawarau Bridge)
***which means I would defy death 9 times, like a cat.
22. Bought six purebred sphinx cats.
And finally….
23. I could have BOUGHT a car for this amount.
In an effort to make this blog more than just venting my bitterness, I’ve included hyperlinks to all of the causes that are not Jenny-related (i.e., binge-eating ice cream), so please take a moment to check some of them out.
And if you have nothing but five dollars to spend, and no more than five minutes, please consider helping my Walk for Hunger team. If only 42 people donate $5, I’ll meet my goal! The deadline is May 4th.
Remember: Be the change you wish to see in the world 🙂
Happy Tuesday.
Travel & Food Writer 
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