Top 10 of 2010

To commemorate the new year, my absolute FAVORITE holiday (as in, I loathe it with a passion only slightly less than that of Valentine’s Day), I’ve decided to compile a list of my top ten moments in 2010. These moments were determined by a sense of long-lasting (at least the entire day) euphoria and general extreme happiness. I’ve listed them chronologically.

1. New Year’s 2010- As I have indicated, New Year’s and I don’t get along. I’ve never had an enjoyable holiday, EXCEPT for last year. It was definitely my best New Year’s ever. It had all of the components to make it that special holiday people experience in movies but not in real life.  Memorable moment, playing Catch Phrase:
Clue: Cinderella and the _____?
Everyone: “SEVEN DWARFS!”
That was the answer they were looking for, and that’s what we all shouted out. However, you know, it’s actually Snow White, right?

2. Going to Boston to see Dave Sedaris– Another “best ever” was my Valentine’s Day gift, tickets to see David Sedaris in Boston. He was my new favorite author and I’d never been to Boston, so it was uber exciting. But the overall hilarity of the trip…I laughed SO hard while waiting at the end of a thousand-person line to have Dave sign our books. We got to choose what we wanted him to write, and Dave read one of his stories that [beware: coarse language] involved a teenage father wearing a shirt that said “Freaky motha fucka” on it. It played a large role in the story, which was the best one he read. Annnyway, so my friend decided he wanted to reference that in the book signing, but he kept messing up and scribbling things out and by the time he got it right, it was unreadable and embarassing. If a sentence could be murdered, that’s what it would look like. Something like:

I had Dave sign mine, “I was just drowning a mouse.” For personal reasons. Then we almost died getting a taxi ride to Uno’s (the driver U-turned into on-coming traffic), and HD–who had “REALLY wanted a…a…salad”–ordered one thats menu description neglected to mention that it was topped with cooked spaghetti. Maybe you just had to be there, but I couldn’t stop laughing.  

3. The Day After the Party and the Day of Squash– I won’t go into detail on the first one because it’s part of the reason why I’m home and thus probably unwise to think about, but it resulted in a happy heart. And it also involved Ruth being our waitress at Jesse’s, which I credit as the day Ruth and I first became good friends.

Anyway, The Day of Squash was, in the words of my roommate Dane, “Amazeballz.”  The first round of squash was with me and Dane, and anytime I play a racquetted sport with Dane, I end up doubled over laughing. He makes a lot of exclamations like I do, including British expressions (“Oh bugga”) and German swear words (“Scheisse!”). THEN, he managed to hit the ball up underneath the scoreboard, and two more squash balls fell out. It was like mitosis meets The Mummy. (There’s a scene in The Mummy where Evie’s brother is golfing inside the crypt and one of his shots knocks the sarcophagus down from the ceiling. It was like that.) We also decided to have a mock tennis battle where I was Maria Sharipova and he was some other chic and every time we hit, we’d scream like they do. Our high pitched echos filled the room and I could barely hit the ball because I was in a fit of giggles.

After that, Daniel and I played our long-awaited squash battle. He’s the one who taught me how to play, but we hadn’t played in months because he hurt his leg. While Daniel was out of commission, another friend (and now assistant high school squash coach) hit with me twice a week and I finally got to the point where I was decent. So this was the challenge I’d been waiting for. Well, we started playing without keeping score…an extended “warm up” I guess, and I won’t lie, I was doing pretty good. He was getting a little annoyed I think because I was hitting some good shots. Then there was a shift and Daniel started faring much better than me, and simultaneously his shoe fell apart. His sole was coming off, but he said he was going to keep playing that way. Everytime he took a step it flapped and white insulation pieces fell out. It was funny and yet SO aggrevating because HELLOOO, if he misses: okay, his shoe is falling apart. But more commonly, if Jenny misses: well, that’s just embarassing. And sad. And SUPER DUPER ANNOYING. I ended up losing, not to mention I hit his racquet against the wall a lot (something I actually try REALLY hard not to do), I fell several times, skinned my knee, hit my shoulder with the racquet, and gave myself dead arm. However, I hit a great boast shot from the back left corner that dropped delicately in the far right corner, and it single-handedly proved I had matured as a player.

4. The Day I Dropped the Women in Prison Class– The day before I decided to drop the class, my friend Dustin astutely observed that I “never smile anymore,” and that’s when I realized the women in prison class needed to go. It was like a two-thousand pound weight was lifted off of me and I frolicked around the green and went to work feeling lighter than air and made a bunch of money. I was definitely high on life that entire day. Then I went to a house party at my old apartment and got to dance. Pretty much anytime I’m dancing, I’m happy.

5. My first NeedtoBreathe Concert- I looooove NeedtoBreathe (a very awesome band) and they played in North Conway, a couple hours away from Hanover. I invited a few people, but at the last minute, everyone sort of bailed, and I thought about bailing, but I didn’t. And I’m so very glad I didn’t! The openers were good, though I’d never heard of them (come to find out, Grace Potter and the Nocturnals are on VH1) and then I mosied up to the front of the crowd for NeedtoBreathe. I met some cool people and after the concert we got to have our paraphernalia signed and take a picture with the band. The guys were very friendly and didn’t judge me when I made embarassing small talk as they signed my shirt. And right before I left, I had a serendipitous meeting with Seth, the bass player (who remembered me at the next concert I went to!) AND I developed my a crush on the lead singer, Bear. I’m pretty sure he’s married though. But yeah, it was the best concert experience ever.

6. Hiking with Sarah and Ruth– I believe Sarah called the devil hike “Ascutney,” but the actual trail had a different name. We sort of got lost trying to find it, but recovered after we made her brakes smell like burning death. (FINE. It was my bright idea to coast down the mountain in neutral because I think we were trying to conserve gasoline.) This trail was completely vertical, for all 12 miles. Okay, maybe four. Or three. Logistics are not important, but it was long and it was straight up and it was the best hike ever if you want exercise. Naturally I loved it. We took iPod videos because none of us took cameras on the hike, except for Sarah whose camera battery had died, and we made it to the top and it was AWEsome. We celebrated on the way down New England style and met up at Molly’s for dinner, where I proceeded to eat a lot of sweet potato fries. Quote for the day: “This gum is changing flavors in my mouth.” (Something Sarah wished to announce to the strangers we were talking to regarding her piece of Stride Flavor Changing gum, but she refrained.)

7. The Day I Ran 10 Miles– Does this need an explanation? I freaking ran 10 miles. I used to not be able to run a mile and a half without keeling over. The reason for running ten miles was because my roommate Steph was doing a 50K and planned to celebrate by eating an entire pizza, so I wanted to meet a running goal that same day and celebrate by eating two pieces of pizza…which I did. And it was glorious. Then we went home and watched Friends on DVD and ate ice cream. ps. High five for Tony, the coolest boss ever, who not only supported me in my efforts by letting me off work early, but also showed me how to calculate my distance using mapmyrun.com and told me how many calories I’d burn. Dude. You rock.

8. My Trip to Maine- One of my goals for the year was to make it to a New England beach and to eat fresh Maine lobster. Well, my good friend, Chris, totally came through for me in this. I drove down to his home outside of Portsmouth and he took me to York beach in Maine. We went the scenic route (aka Garmin failed us), but we found everything we needed. I got to put my toes in the freezing Atlantic water! And we went to eat lobster, and it was so cheap. We (okay, Chris) made a total mess of lobster water everywhere, and the cadaver of his crustacean was quite disgusting when he was finished. Again, I was in stitches (yes, I’m using grandmother expressions) because he just makes me laugh so hard. Not by telling jokes or anything, but just by being himself. And he has great skill! He can kill flies with amazing swiftness! The first one he killed was at the lobster place. It had landed on the corner of the table and he got it. But the NEXT day, we were at a diner and he killed a fly that landed on his forehead by hitting himself, at an extreme velocity, in the forehead. The dead fly fluttered lifelessly before him onto the table. He nearly gave himself whiplash, and it was right as the waitress came to take our order. Chris: “That would have sucked if I didn’t kill it.”

9. Dan and Ross’s Housewarming Party– I was still excited by my Roswell adventure (another great 2010 moment, but it was an entire WEEK and thus qualifies as something else, i.e. I don’t have room for it here), I’d just dyed my hair, I’d bought a new shirt, and I’d submitted my thesis proposal. So it was already a good day. I went to work and had the fortunate assignment to waitress a private party, a group of lovely people who drank a lot, and I got to leave early. The house party was good times because I got to see the incredible four-story pad for the first time. I thought the window curtain in the loft was a slide projector screen, a detail which plays no relevance in the story, but that I think is funny because I voiced this observation out loud. Then I played a weird card game with a bunch of engineering masters students I’d never met before and it was highllly amusing. The game involved coming up with a word that began with the first letter of the card drawn. Ex: Eight – “elephant”  Some funny ones: Two = tits; Ten= tassel; King = knickers. HONESTLY?? Of all the words that begin with K, someone came up with knickers. Then it turned into a small (perhaps, ahem, three people?) dance party to the newly made “dance” CD with great hits from Ke$ha and Lady Gaga and even Rihanna. It was like dance Heaven. There was even a dance off. Granted I was the only one sober enough to remember the winner, but I’d have to say it was me.

10. My Last Day in Scotland– I could say my whole Scotland adventure, but that’s too long to write about, so I’ll just write about the last day because it was pretty much everything I’d hoped for. I went on a tour of the Highlands, which are beautfiul, and did a lot of hiking and gourmet hot chocolate drinking and pastry tasting. The tour guide had an amazing accent and he called The Stone of Destiny a Big Red Toilet Seat, which is even funnier when spoken with the accent.  He also played fun Scottish jams and gave me a list of local artists so I could look them up on iTunes. In the evening, I went randomly walking down the street to find a bar and meet some Scottsmen, and I did! I met two guys who took me under their wing and became my wingmen…sort of…at this other bar where there were a bunch of rugby players wearing kilts. They introduced me to one who was like, “What are you doing here?” and I said, “It’s my last night in Scotland and I just wanted to meet Scottish people. I haven’t really met any since I’ve been here.” So he told me to “Wait right here.” The next thing I knew, all these people were coming up to me, asking if I was the American who wanted to meet Scottish people, and they were taking pictures with me and toasting with me and it was SO much fun. In fact, these other people in the bar came up to me and asked if I was famous because everyone wanted to take a picture with me. I said yes (no, I didn’t. I have such a guilty face! I told them the truth) but they still wanted to take a picture with me, too. The evening ended with a goodnight kiss from a Scottish personal trainer who works with professional athletes, so now I get to cross that off my bucketlist.

Hope you all have a Happy 2011 🙂